Well here we are boys and girls. The best part of the week. Working on these writeups is honestly kinda regularly stressful, but OreGairu definitely makes me appreciate the way 23 minutes can stretch to an hour. There are many shows that I love, but OreGairu is pretty close to the one I would actually want to make.

Okay, I’d actually emphasize the romance more, and there’d probably be an FLCL-esque fantastical metaphor for some of the underlying personal themes, and I’d let more scenes rise to cathartic release and not cut them off with harsh, realistic anticlimax. But still!

Many weeks ago, someone mentioned how the festival we’re now in the thick of would probably mark the halfway point of the light novels. Narrative-wise, that feels about right – Hikki still has a long way to go, and the character turn Yuki’s about to hit isn’t going to “fix” everything, or possibly anything. But it will certainly change things.

Both their viewpoints have always been naïve and hypocritical, but they’ve always managed to distance the contradictory elements of their philosophies and personalities from each other. Right now, Yuki’s caught deep in the lie of her need to be better than her sister – she can’t accept that she’s just a very different person with very different strengths. If things had gone normally, she’d probably be willing to rely on Hikki to help her at this point – he’s the one person who understands her well enough for her to act shields-down around. But right now, he’s also the person most representative of her hypocrisy. And so, with no escape route that doesn’t require giving up her pride, she’s fled from the situation.

Hikki’s viewpoint is less complicated – he’s convinced he knows the rules and hates the game, so he refuses to play and tells himself it’s better that way. Last week proved he’s not so callous as all that – he deliberately made a fool of himself for the sake of Yuki’s pride. He tells himself he can’t forgive her, but I think he already has, and the only reason this charade is going on is because he’s too attached to his fraying viewpoint as well.

Honestly, it’s freaking poetry watching this house of cards crumble down. They could certainly take an easy route out here – since Yuki accepted Hikki’s rescue with relative grace, they could conceivably have Hikki continue to resolve this situation – but that’s pretty much the last thing I want to see. Yuki needs this more than Hikki does. Bring on the blood.

Episode 11

1:19 – Jeez Hikki, calling Yui? You are terrible at not caring about this situation

5:41 – Aw man, they’re being such good friends here. No defensiveness at all – “I won’t tell you some idealistic nonsense, but this can’t be the right way to handle this.” “What is the right way, then?” “I don’t know”

6:10 – Yesssss. “Not ‘someone,’ or ‘everyone,’ rely on us.” Yui ain’t playing games with their philosophical bullshit – this is about whether they can trust each other

6:11 – And of course Yuki can’t possibly respond to that

7:16 – Hikki’s signature move – leaving the room when the other two express an honest moment, uncomfortable and assuming he’s not meant to be a part of it, the way it’s always been

7:38 – “They say if you change yourself you can change the world, but that’s a complete lie.” God, he’s such a fuckin’ prick. He’s being offered the open door here, but he’s still determined to stick to his pride. That’s understandable, of course – he articulated his fear of getting betrayed during the Yui fight. Still sucks to see it, though

9:20 – “If you look at it closely, one side is just relaxing.” Goddamn, Hikki. I doubt Yuki wants this – this is all yourrage here

10:40 – Nope, she’s cool with it! I don’t think initial Yuki would have taken kindly to being supported this way – she may not be willing to rely on them, but she certainly won’t reject their support

11:09 – And it really did help – Hikki’s attack put Sagami incredibly off-balance, allowing Yuki to regain control of the meeting and the committee. Damn, Hikki!

11:34 – “You make excuses for the dumbest things, but you won’t do it when you actually need to, will you?” Looks like he’s more of your ideal person, then you thought, eh Yuki? NOW KISS

12:29 – Oh my god they’re adorable. Okay, so Yuki wasn’t actually forced to clear up the initial problem, and Hikki did in fact make a tremendous peace offering. So the conflict didn’t force the Yuki breakthrough I was hoping for, but either way they’re back to bantering again

15:53 – Man, how is Sagami gonna fuck everything up? They’ve spent an entire episode having her make vindictive pouty faces

16:52 – “Vice-Chairman… we can all hear you flirting with Hikki.”

17:42 – This might be the first time I’ve actually laughed at Trap, purely because Hayama hamming it up is just amazing. Hayama is so great

19:16 – They share a look yet again. This is actually worrying – this episode is pressing Hikki and Yuki’s relationship so positively and aggressively that it’s pretty much guaranteed something is going to go horribly wrong

19:41 – “So I haven’t heard anything about what you want to know.” Seriously. She’s not an idiot, Hikki

And Done

D’awww. All three of these characters are so adorable when they’re actually getting along. The resolution to Yuki getting cornered ended up requiring fewer concessions than I’d expected, but of course, this show is always more about subtle changes in perspective than groundbreaking paradigm shifts. And this episode certainly changed some perspectives – Yuki in particular was much more honest than before, and her confidence is beginning to come across as less brittle and more natural. There’s no edge in her humor any more – she and Hikki are perfectly comfortable with each other (so comfortable they were making everyone else uncomfortable, which was a nice gag), and Hikki’s “inability to forgive her” certainly has a strange way of expressing itself, what with his casting himself as the villain specifically to rescue her. Granted, that’s something that’s always come naturally to him, but as opposed to his work with the club, this time there was no possible pretense involved – he was just working hard to help a close friend.

And yeah, “close friend.” This episode had Yuki regularly smiling, openly admitting her friendship with Hikki through that “see you tomorrow,” and pretty much overtly flirting with him. Meanwhile, Hikki makes an incredibly obvious pass at seeing how she feels about him, and gets encouraged to admit his feelings for himself. With two episodes to go, a traditional ending would dictate a final act of desperation from Sagami that throws everything in jeopardy, a temporary break in Yuki and Hikki’s current trust, and an ultimate reconciliation that wraps up all the loose ends. But this isn’t a traditional show, and it’s an adaptation of an ongoing series anyway. I’d personally be perfectly happy with Live Alive Redux followed by a full episode of smooches, but something tells me it’s not gonna be quite that simple.

Welp, time to not watch more OreGairu for seven days…

OreGairu! Finally.

Last week set up the ideal conflict for our There’s-no-way-I’d-fall-in-lovebirds. Concealing her previous run-in (lul) with Hikki pretty much puts the lie to Yuki’s entire philosophy – if she’s not above lying about that, her bluntly honest persona and declarations of moral superiority are dust. The acknowledgment of both how artificial her standards are and her own inability to match them would be quite the blow to her – ostracized by her own lack of social grace and living in the shadow of her sister, she doesn’t have a whole lot else to lean on.

Meanwhile, Hikki’s doing his best to revert back to his callous and well-defended initial self, but his own respect and feelings for Yuki are definitely going to make that difficult. In spite of his own “better” judgment, he values their time together – but forgiving her and accepting her lie would mean breaking with his own angry and self-satisfied view of human interactions, and the power balance between them has always relied on each of them maintaining their own brittle confidence anyway. Forgiving and forgetting would involve a lot of honesty and trust that I don’t think either of them are really ready for.

Fortunately, we have Yui there to break the ice and trample headlong through their silly little psychological games.

This one’s gonna be good.

Episode 10

0:40 – Just sitting in silence at opposite ends of the table. Yeah, seriously, you two are super mature

4:28 – Hikki’s certainly much more negative than he was at the start – he’s taking things much more personally. I also like Yui’s jerk friend still sticking up for her

5:30 – “You’re Haru’s sister, right? Her festival was amazing” Man, this episode is laying on the wound-salt like crazy

6:56 – God, their interactions are just painful to watch. If neither of them actually cared that much, there wouldn’t be any problem – but they’re both so proud, and they really do value each other’s respect, and the power structure of their banter is just way too fragile. FIX THIS OREGAIRU

7:32 – “I’ve decided to suspend the club.” Nooo! NOOOO! This is how it happens! Not with a big cathartic fight – you just let that waiting argument simmer, but you never address it, so you avoid interaction altogether and the relationship just fades away

8:19 – “Working together is a part of growing as well.” Yuki sits, staring downward, hand on her chin. She keeps her thoughts to herself

10:15 – Man, it is just painful to see Yuki’s confidence this damaged. From her perspective, taking this job is great, though – she can avoid coming clean with Hikki by avoiding the situation entirely and recovering her ego elsewhere – by directly competing with her sister’s legacy

14:21 – OH GOD HIT THE BREAKS WHAT IS HARU DOING HERE

14:30 – “She put on a concert. It was amazing!” ”I. Know.”

15:57 – What’s Haru’s game here? Is she really just that cruel?

16:29 – Or is she trying to make it impossible for Yuki to run from the situation?

17:20 – Nope, pretty cruel!

18:40 – “You should rely on others before it gets to that point.” They’re really emphasizing that theme this episode, which makes sense for this conflict, and hopefully is the reason Haru chose to isolate Yuki – she wants to force her to approach people from a position of mutual support and some degree of trust, not just leadership/superiority. And of course that kind of admitting your own fallibility would certainly resolve this Hikki situation quickly, too

It’s certainly not out of character for Hikki to remain on the sideline through all this, but it’s still kind of sad to watch. Not that Yuki would be interested in anything she could construe as pity from him right now

20:33 – Aw man, and just as I say that, he decides he can’t take it any more

And Done

Well, that was painful. They’re setting the tension as high as possible for this last act, and even introduced a character basically just to make life horrible for Yuki. The show itself is being pretty damn merciless here – she was already trapped in a lie regarding her philosophy, and now the festival is making her defend that philosophy in the face of basically everyone around her, with no support from Yui or Hikki. Well, until the end there, when Hikki’s empathy and obviously still-present respect for Yuki made him finally speak out and take the fall for what she really wanted to say. I think this is the longest the show has ever ridden some particular emotional status quo, but it’s not wasting time – it’s building tension towards some (likely horrible) breaking point. I’ve kept saying I want more Yuki development, and we’re certainly getting that – vicious, paradigm-breaking, Shinji Ikari-style Yuki development.

Fortunately, that happens to be my favorite kind.